Land Value Taxation Campaign

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Home Dodgy Dossier

Dodgy dossier

Welcome to the Dodgy Dossier. Here can be found reports from, amongst other contributors, the Campaign's team of newshounds, as well as our resident economic analyst Charlotte-Anne Schreiber. Some of the stories in this part of the web site may be informative, but please be warned that they have been written with tongue firmly in cheek and should  not be taken too seriously. Have a good laugh!

You can bet on the banks


There is increasing nervousness in government circles about proposed changes that will split up and ring-fence the retail arm of the banks from the tarnished investment or 'casino' operations that contributed to the current crash.

However, we have obtained a leaked draft report containing proposals suggesting that far from separating the retail and investment arms, the government is planning to allow the banks to become more profitable by expanding their activities into the mainstream betting industry.

Quack! Quack!

Our sleuths have discovered that the hacking scandal has extended to eavesdropping on private conversations between doctors and patients. We have been passed the transcript of one conversation from a surgery somewhere in the Whitehall area.

A cursory rhyme

There was an old woman
Who banked with the Euro.
She had so little money
She didn't know how to
Pay her bills
And feed her children.

She was up to her neck
In millions of debt.
She was strapped for cash and
Her economy?

Mansion tax proposal demolished

Vince Cable has revived his idea for a mansion tax. It (the tax, not the mansion) is demolished here.

Buy OxyCorp stock

It is an unfortunate fact that until now, air has been freely available to everyone, and stands almost entirely outside the market system. A promising new technology is being developed which should finally put a stop to this unsatisfactory state of affairs, putting the planet's atmosphere on the same economic footing as the planet's surface.

This development is long overdue, but has been held back by the lack of an effective technology. No-one seriously questions that it is right and proper for people to be able to enclose land and call it "their property". The ability to enclose air in the same way should lead to a significant economic breakthrough which will bring benefits to all.

Scientists are now perfecting the technology which will make it possible to capture and enclose the entire atmosphere of the world, for bottling and re-sale.

The key patent applications are being lodged by OxyCorp Inc, and since the stock of this company is set to soar to stratospheric heights, we advise our readers to buy at the earliest opportunity.

Details of the market model are still to be finalised, but we expect there will be various subscription and bulk-purchase arrangements. Air will, at last, be traded in the markets just like any other commodity.

This produced the following response

Revealing find at London School of Economics

On March 8th the Times published a letter from Lord Kalms saying that around 1991 he offered the London School of Economics a grant to set up a Chair of Business Ethics. The faculty rejected the offer as it saw no correlation between ethics and economics. By pure chance a Latvian cleaner at the LSE found what we take as a draft or copy of the rejection letter behind a cupboard. Although we cannot authenticate the letter we take the opportunity of publishing it here today.

Grin and bear it

There's no money for this
And we can't afford that
We have to work harder for longer for less.
Do not shirk
Get some work!
Don't relax
Pay your tax!

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